BLUE MONEY… a movie involving the porn industry that has no porn. Not that I’ve ever seen a porn. Never. Not once. Ever. BLUE MONEY stars a fellow named Alain Patrick who doesn’t speak very good English and a very good looking lady named Barbara Mills. They play a young couple just trying to make it – and build a boat and sail the seas smoking dope and selling home made crafts. Like we all do. Let’s fire up the projector and get started ~ (as always, these pictures are best viewed larger by clicking on them):

WHAAAAAAATTTT????  Just look at all of the beautiful 8 tracks!!!

God love the 70s ~

Have a good day at work, my love ~

Filming some porn ~

I have never seen a porn -_- but their porns involve some screwing on a filthy mattress in the middle of a darkened warehouse…

Later that night, our main man gets his own porn on ~

 ~ and gets about polishing up his mast the next day ~

~ to the chagrin of his pot addicted wife ~

~ back on the set ~

~ someone came to work “on her period” ~

~ so they need to find a replacement. Introducing Inga ~

~ she’s lovely and you just know from the outset they’re going to go ball ~

~ YUP ~

~ Later, at a party, they all smoke some grass and discuss the merits of porn ~

~ check out this haute couture ~

~ the next morning the wife accuses him of balling Inga so she packs up the kid and splits!! ~

~ At the office, Nixon is cracking down on the porn industry!!! Everything is falling apart!!! ~

~ The solution?? Film some porn at the apartment!! ~

~ But it’s a bust!!! The cops storm in like they own the place!!! ~

~ Our man gets free with a slap on the wrist and a lecture from a guy with a lot of hair ~

~ His wife picks him up from the slammer and they hit the ocean to live out their dreams ~

FINAL ANALYSIS: Is this going to get you laid?? Probably not, it’s slow and pretty boring and the lead can’t act for shit so you might be a little distracted and find yourself thinking about other things. Like: “How can I get laid” or “I wonder if he/she wants to get laid?” or “goddamn it’s cold outside, how can I get laid?”